Thursday, August 8, 2024

As American as Apple Pie - Armchair Critics and Simone Biles

Agência Brasil Fotografias,
Creative Commons Attribution 2.0

    There are few things more American than apple pie, but apparently one of them is to criticize others.  (Oddly, the people who seem most likely to say, "You have no right to judge me!" frequently seem to be the same ones who don't hesitate to judge others. But I digress.) But there's a person out there who is being judged, and judged, and judged. Not just on balance beam, but in the court of public opinion.

    I'm talking about a woman whom I idolize just a little bit: Simone Biles, who though she be but little, she is fierce.  She's our very own GOAT (Greatest of All Time for my older readers) gymnast, who at 27 is still winning gold in a sport where people start to wash out by 20.  

    But just in the last several weeks, I've seen people criticize Simone Biles for:

1. Her hair

    Apparently, people think her hair needs to be perfect when she's flying through the air at the Olympics, and at her wedding a year or so ago.   The only appropriate thing to say to a woman at her wedding is, "You look GREAT, and I'm so happy for you!" or as she wins a gold medal at the Paris-freaking-Olympics, it's "You did GREAT, and I'm so proud of you!!!"   And seriously, if people are criticizing her lovely thick hair, what must they think of my unkempt, frizzy, graying, and quite obviously thinning hair? 

2. Her medals

    Holy shit, people are angry because her husband (while wearing her medal) posed for a picture with her. It was cute and funny, and don't you remember that in the 1950s, girls wore their boyfriend's letter jackets? Hell, I came up in the 1980s, and girls were STILL borrowing letter jackets from their dates.  Yeah, it's hers, and yeah, he's wearing it, but honestly, you think people are going to get confused who earned it? That if he puts it on and dreams of winning gold, that it somehow diminishes her win?  Besides, if she had a problem with him wearing it, I doubt she would have happily posed with him, nor posted the picture (which is really cute and fun).

3. Her attitude on the podium

    I kid you not - in the video of her team atop the podium being awarded the gold medal, the women were standing with their hands on their hearts, eyes sparkling, smiling, excited, and happy.  They gazed respectfully at the flag, but instead of feeling pride and joy on their behalf, people online bitched that the American gymnasts were too snobby to sing along with the anthem, like the athletes from other countries. There is no winning, because if they HAD sung, people would have complained they weren't solemn enough.

4. Dropping out of the LAST Olympics

    Jesus, people, maybe we should just trust Simone when she says it was too dangerous for her to compete.  The "twisties" are a real thing, and they are incredibly dangerous.  When someone is tumbling through the air, they need to know where their body is, and she didn't. I'm no gymnast, but I am a pretty good swimmer (not world-class by any means, but I did the swim team and lifeguarding thing), and one time I was once playing in the ocean and got tumbled by a wave, and suddenly, I couldn't tell which way was up, I was running out of air, and for a few terrifying moments, I thought I was going to drown in waist-deep water.  Now imagine yourself flying through the air and not knowing where the ground is.  Or imagine driving a car, and your brakes go out.  You really think it's so unreasonable for someone to refuse to drive the car until the brakes are fixed? Yeah, it's a shame she had to drop out, but better that, than sticking the landing on her neck instead of her feet.  Yet, people claimed she failed her country.  I say her country failed her.  People value loyalty so much... yet where was the loyalty to her, one of our greatest athletes?

5. Bringing down Larry Nassar

    She joined the voices accusing the respected Olympic team doctor of sexual abuse.  I really don't get it, but people -- instead of sympathizing with the victims -- often side with the abuser, assuming the victims are just out to get him.  Simone, due to her popularity and success, gets more notice, has more power to be heard.  For many, however, sexual abuse is still something shameful, something to be hidden, and they just cannot approve of the public discussion.  

    In the end, the real issue is that Simone Biles is an outspoken Black woman. She shares memes of her Black job, she claps back at people criticizing her hair, and she puts people in their place when they cross her very reasonable boundaries.  God forbid a woman tell people how to behave, let alone a Black woman.  

    But you know what? She's setting an excellent example for all women, showing us that we no longer need to suffer in silence, that we shouldn't put up with the jerks, that we should take down the abusers, and that she (and we) can set and enforce boundaries.  I don't just idolize her gymnastic talent, but her fierceness, too.  This out-of-shape, middle-aged woman wants to be just like Simone Biles when I grow up.

    I know that with this post, I've joined the ranks of judgemental folks, and yet here I am, clutching my pearls and saying this: you guys can be real assholes. And maybe now I'm one too for saying this next bit, but you need to sit down, shut up, and mind your own damn business.

    And most of all (and I can't believe this needs to be said but apparently it does), when an athlete wins a gold medal, you should be saying things like: "You did GREAT!" or, "Congratulations!" or, "Thank you for your service to our country!"

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